19 WTF and going strong - mad - tired

July 20

Lots of meetings - stayed up too late with Jim. There was a walk some day, not sure which.

 World: 14,705,330 - 609,955
US: 3,830,045 - 140,906 dead
Sweden: 78,048 - 5,639 dead
Russia:

Florida: 360,394 - 5,072 dead

Texas: 343,783 - 4,106 dead 

July 21

We took a nap and there was so much I remembered, stories I was going to share of times and things and people and they were so vivid in my mind and now they are gone. One of the things is Middlemarch - Dorothea who really was a saint, living a small life, but bringing good to the world, changing the fabric of reality around her. Trying to think of a way to tell MW that he matters, that he underestimates his influence on the world. Talked to Jonas who is doing okay, although C is still so very anxious. He got to do Walmart curbside pickup though - out of the house, so that is good.

Remember to breathe, remember you are just a tiny thing, remember to love.

 World: 14,898,145 - 615,462
US: 3,899,072 - 141,992 dead
Sweden: 78,166 - 5,646 dead
Russia:

Florida: 369,834 - 5,206 dead

Texas: 351,071 - 4,199 dead 

July 22

I just caught myself thinking that I would pray for someone ... never thought that before ... just sending good wishes for them out into the aether ... Talked with some really good students today, and they give me hope ... you know ... long term.

Dinner from Chickfilet that we ate in the car in the park. Then I did a short walk and Jim waited in the truck and then we went home. The Borgias - better than I thought.

 World: 15,177,447 - 622,183
US: 3,969,786 - 143,178 dead
Sweden: 78,504 - 5,667 dead
Russia:

Florida: 379,619 - 5,345 dead

Texas: 363,615 - 4,439 dead 

July 23

I feel very privileged and we had a hot fudge sundae when we were trying to get beer.

 World: 15,446,800 - 632,178
US: 4,034,102 - 144,242 dead
Sweden: 78,763- 5,676 dead
Russia:

Florida: 389,868 - 5,518 dead

Texas: 371,929 - 4,607 dead 

July 24

Got a fair bit underway. New ICE regulations - again. Rick is in hospice (died tonight) and the classes have to be changed.

 World: 15,676,604 - 638,577
US: 4,111,950 - 145,539 dead
Sweden: 78,997- 5,697 dead
Russia:

Florida: 402,312 - 5,653 dead

Texas: 380,364 - 4,790 dead 

July 25

Talked to mom for a bit. Left the house at three and went for a bike-rack and then to get the mail and then dinner from Rosa's at Lauri's. Some stress along the day. Talked w L about how we have not solved our Sudokus lately. There is a fog over everything.

Also, I should write about how we are bad at listening, just riffing on each others stories to tell our own. I tell a story to make a point. He hears the story but has his own point to make. I feel not heard.

 World: 16,046,986 - 644,528
US: 4,178,021 - 146,460 dead
Sweden: 78,997- 5,697 dead
Russia: 805,332 - 13,172

Florida: 414,511 - 5,777 dead

Texas: 390,286 - 4,990 dead 

July 26

Rachel and I started book 8. Talked about how hard it is to set boundaries with other people - even when it might kill you not to do so. Talked with Annika - T is hurting and doesn't always say so. Doctor's screwed up giving medication that gives you an ulcer without giving the ulcer medication. People are human - yeah, but no. Can you be mad at someone who is really sick or do they always get to win? Building a desk for your partner, what a labor of love.

Sex, Terry Black, walk on the park bridge. Aeon Flux (20 minutes was all we could stand), and then episode one of Saturday Night Live. Brilliant.

 World: 16,201,176 - 647,928
US: 4,233,927 - 146,934 dead
Sweden: 78,997- 5,697 dead
Russia:

Florida: 423,855 - 5,854 dead

Texas: 394,084 - 5,076 dead